A Washington insider leaks what
tax payers will be receiving from
President Obama's stimulus package!
Dear Tax Payer, Have you been worried about the present state of our economy? We sure have been. Now we have a new President, President Obama, and he has a stimulus package before Congress that he is desperately trying to have passed. What exactly is in it for the tax payer? Where are your tax dollars being spent? Well, you are in luck, we have inside information which was leaked from a Washington insider and we are going to let you know exactly what you can expect to receive from President Obama's Stimulus Package. |
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| WHEN WILL I RECEIVE MY STIMULUS PACKAGE? |
President Obama cannot wait to get his stimulus package into your hands. The President and our illustrious Congress are in session and working tirelessly to get President Obama's stimulus package into your hands as soon as possible. If only those damn Republicans with their morals and their values were not holding up the show, President Obama's stimulus package would already be on it's way. |
We have arranged for early shipment of your stimulus package!
| OK, WHAT DOES PRESIDENT OBAMA WANT TO SEND ME? |
Here is what you will receive with President Obama's stimulus package. |
Barack's Cock |
A tube of Stimu-lube |
President Obama's stimulus package comes with a life size recreation of Barack's cock so he can personally fuck each of us individually, right up the ass. Also, just like his slick speeches, President Obama was gracious enough to include a bottle of some really slick stuff called Stimu-lube. Now, as a tax payer, you can to the already painful experience of being raped by President Obama's Stimulus Package. |
| ACT NOW AND RECEIVE A SPECIAL BONUS! |
Be one of the first lucky 100,000 tax payers and receive President Obama's special bonus, a mask of the President himself. Now you, your spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend, life partner, friend with benefits or inflatable partner can don the Obama mask so you can look him in the eyes while you are being screwed. NOTE: the mask is designed purely for use indoors and is not recommended to be worn outdoors. Wearing the mask outdoors could cause serious health risks such as being beaten by the police or arrested for matching the description of someone who had committed a crime in the neighborhood. |
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| WHAT IF I WAS A CAMPAIGN CONTRIBUTOR? |
Unfortunately, contributors to President Obama's political campaigns do not receive this stimulus package, they only receive a check. Not to worry though, you will have enough money to buy these products on your own, no need for the government to supply them to you. Yes, even if your organization has committed criminal acts, you will still receive a check. What have we learned here? Crime pays and it pays very handsomely. |
DISCLAIMER: Barack's cock was not harmed in the creation of this web page, but several tubes of Stimu-lube somehow turned up missing. If you have not figured by now that this is simply a joke, you need to get outdoors more often. None of these products are real, nor are they actually part of President Obama's stimulus plan. If you don't find it funny then don't laugh and don't send me nasty e-mails or sue me. This enitre web page was done purely for humor. |
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